My Blogs

Thursday, July 25, 2013

An Independent Child.

One of the hardest things we do as a parent is letting our child go out in the world.  I have done this many times.  But children need to learn independence.  Like a baby holding to his mother's finger learning to take his first steps, mom is proud and but at the same time she knows her baby is growing up.  She wants so much to keep hold of him before he takes that first step, but she lets go and watches with pride as he tip-toes to daddy.

I am a 49 year old mom and had to watch first my baby girl grow up, take her first job at 15 years old.  She graduated high school six months before the rest of her class.  I cried so hard when she moved out at 17, but I helped her gather her things, spread her wings and fly away into adulthood.  Next I watched my first son do the same thing but he didn't go as easy as my daughter.  He wanted to still hold on to mom's hand, but I pushed him out of the nest, crying as I did it, and made him fly on his own.  He told me that was the best thing I could have done for him.  It helped him to become a man and made him strong enough to at 19 to become a father to a beautiful baby girl of his own and two years later to a little boy just like him. 

But lately I have been running into some "adults" that still expect their elderly parents to support them. One sweet lady that is 75 years old supporting two of her children that are in their 40's and even 50's.  Another dear lady in her late 60's doing the same thing.  The "children" never learned to support themselves and stand on their own feet. 

I know how important it is for parents to teach their children to be independent even at an early age.  Start at 4-5 years old, believe or not they can pick up their own toys.  At 7 years old it not impossible for them to help do their own laundry, like folding shirts.  Chores will not injure children in any way.  Let them grow up and let them do things you think they are unable to do, they just may surprise you. 

And grow up to become independent adults that will day say thank you for letting go of the tiny finger so they can grow.